no fair! I never get any comments anymore. :C I guess I'll just have to go off and delete it, eh?

oh, btw, update for all you HOPELESS PEOPLE who go all ROMANTIC FOR ME: just friends for now, may evolve into something later, but we (more specifically me) are waiting until we grow up a little bit. more mature, more in tune with knowing what we want. (hey, I know what I want [or at least I think I do] but can it ever work for me? noooo....) meh, whatever. anne, he still thinks you're crazy weird.

fwah, so there's a fireside tonite at the church (lousy people don't believe in casual dress around here, bah!) and then there's a party at zack's house which SUPPOSEDLY I'm not even going to be allowed to stay at after 11. cursed parents. oh well. I'll be hanging out with them crazy people from 9ish to 11ish. I'll stay there as long as I can, seeing as my parents don't trust me enough, I think I'll give 'em a scare to kick off the new year. and maybe a grounding. (my parent's don't ground, so disregard that.) meh, but what do I know! maybe I'll just be a good girl and skip it all together. naw, zackum wouldn't like that. although, I don't think my parents will be alone in the ruling (not letting their kids drive when there's drunks and who knows what else out there on the roads).

so those were some pretty big paragraphs for my blog. I think I agree with liana, these are becoming way to diary based. ah well. I'm sure you people appriciate SOME snippits about it.

.... right?

meh. whatever, I'm off to.... do something.... ?

~Rayla

@};~

78th post

oooooh! I had a flight dream the other day! I was so happy! the first one ever! I was like, a bird! ..... regardless, I was crashing into trees and the ground sometimes, but hey! I flew! that's all I care about. ha!

boring bum. lazy, unmotivated, isolated...

"I check people's blogs multiple times a day," he says. "I'm just too lazy to update it." tcha, no kidding! and he's reading this right now and LAUGHING cuz he KNOWS it's TRUE! HA!

and he has yet to play that owed game of isketch with me. HA! like he remembered. tch!

meh.

dance tomorrow... and the sweetness in my life will be there! if anyone can't guess what that is. hmm. I dunno, 'e claims 'e hasn't been ta any of th' dance afore, and dancin' with some 'o them luverly ladies is sumthin' he claims to need be doin', more fer hisself than the girlies. Sum a' us is hopin' 'e asks a certin' someone, eh?

I'ma goin' piratey, mateys! even tho' the day fer talkin' as one is long past, eh!

Dunno where that came from. I could talk mole instead, burr oi!

HA! dunno. don't ask. fwah, going now. enough madness I think. tcha!

~Rayla

@};~

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL!

yes, happy holidays! fwah.

so saturday went relatively well, I think. hmm. I heard him say it too. "I think this first date was a success, don't you?" heh. yeah. I'll bet the second one'll be just as good. if we get that far... (shut up!)

fwah. so he came to my house 2:25 - 2:35 (or something) left for kendall 10 and watched eragon. nothing big, eh? (was a pretty good movie, btw. streamline, but good.) went to oberweis, had ice cream w/ mike & liana (the double for the date) and then drove me home. here's the kink. my parents insisted that he stay and take part in "holiday traditions" (frosting cookies). so he stayed and helped out a bit with that (he didn't even eat/take home his own cookies! what's up with that?) and then we sat down on the couch and popped in another movie. A Wonderful Life, I think. but we left 20 minutes into it (it was almost 7). so jokingly he was like, "you know, you could come home with me and meet 2 of my sisters, 2 of my brothers and a sis-in-law!" halfly wanting to spend more time with him and halfly to meet part of his family, I tagged along.

we got to his house to find the family watching Finding Neverland, at, of course, the part where I ALWAYS cry. always. so we're sitting there, watching this movie and 5 of the 8 in the room are crying (including me) and stuart's like "I must be heartless, I'm not crying. come to think of it, I never cry during movies." and I'm just like "shut up and let me cry!" he just laughed and tryed to keep poking me. meh. so then it's over and I'm like "hmm, I should probably go home" so then he and his bro drove me home (the other car was in use, and stuart wasn't about to use his brother's car. nice car. oh, anyways.) which was a little weird, but not too bad.

so yeah, in a nutshell, was much nice. we haven't really discussed if we're doing out, but apparently to someone coughMIKEcough we are going out because we went out on one date. hmpf! I shall deal with him later. anyways.

well, I must go, it's getting late and I'm stuffed and tired. 'night!

well, my blog is being weird and not posting with my paragraphs and smushing it all together into one. hmpf. oh well. I'll attempt to fix it later.

anywho! I LOVE KIMMY! she's the most awesomest person alive! lol, she's cool. she just shaved her head cuz she's going through chemo. :( but it's good, mi madre y yo made matching hats and we saw her today and took mucho fotos. :) yay! me gusta. I hope they turn out good, I post them here someday!

tcha!

happy holidays, all. I'm off to eat some reject cookies and get ready for *later* :P heehee.

why is no one ever on when I am, but then everyone comes on when I'm about to leave? it boggles the mind.

~Rayla

@};~

haHA!

I'm so proud of myself. fixed anne's blog, I did. ha! :)

random note: seminary this morning was great. food, flannel pjs, a big warm quilt and sitting next to the person you love while playing with each other's hands is a great mix. mmm.... I think we layed on each others shoulder a few dozen times.... mmm. Mike, I agree with you. winter's the best time for romance....

hmmm. love is in the air. and for the best time of the year, too. mmm. I'm all warm and fuzzy just thinking about it.....

mm. now I wonder, should we start thinking/worrying about the first kiss? jk, jk. don't answer that.

changin' with the season,

~Rayla

@};~

ha!

3 days.

nuff said, but I'm sure you don't care about that. anyways!

mmmmm. flannel pjs, huge warm quilt and giraffe pillow are in the forcast for tomorrow. mmm.

and crazy is the forecast all week....

huzzah. more like, happy crazy, and next week. FWAH!

hmm. 5 minutes from break, and I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOO boared. (to take kit's spelling.) tcha! movies sound good..... with a certain somone ya love.... hehe.

3 minutes..... gah, the last bit is always the longest, isn't it? just like waiting for answers, end of a super long piece of music, the end of someone's blog.... like mine..... ha!

@};~

//::eDiT::\\

I just up-ed my template. look good, yay? nay? feedback, por favor!!

we're on break now. finally! ...but some how, no one's on... how strange. hmm.

Mike, let me know when you're free so we can do some serious work on the story. thankee!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! ... just thought I'd throw that out there. :)

RANTIFY!

Bad:

• curse you dominant, half diminished and fully diminished vii chords. (if I could swear,) DANG YOU!
• meh. mike's selling his child on ebay (curse you for that too). MURDERER! ...
• computer's way too slow. (curse it! again.)
• almost failing US history. (cursed homework.)
• history project due tuesday/wednesday
• chem assessment on wednesday (possibly? it might even be tuesday. GAH!)
• music theory test on tuesday/wednesday
• dang, I missed all those curse whatever's. CURSEIT! BAH!

If there's bad things, I have to even out with the good:

• date in 6 days.
• not failing chem! (yet?)
• dance on the 29th.
• new year's eve, and I have someone to kiss this year. jk.
• mistletoe. wait, that *could be* bad if mike brings some saturday. I'll keep everyone updated on that.

yeah, right? it's the lovely life for me, I think my aunt is coming! Meh, I think that every time the bad outweighs to good.

meh. and stuart wants me to be the dominant one and decide. HA! I made that mistake once, I refuse to do it again. I WILL NOT BE THE CAUSE AGAIN. I WILL NOT HAVE THEM DO SOMETHING THEY REALLY DON'T WANT TO. I WILL NOT BE THE ONE WHO DECIDES, THEN IS RAISED UP IN MY OWN WORLD OF IT AND THEN BE LET DOWN BE REALITY. I WON'T BE THE ONE TO WRITE IT IN STONE!

I will not, I just can't. I won't, I just... couldn't... handle that again...

I just... can't....

peerpressurebebad

WELL. I feel funny, not blogging for a week. tff. I figure I'm going to be browsing around enough, I might as well make an effort to post sometimes. *shrugs* ah well.

So earlier this week/month/year (who knows) I realized how young I still am. Yes, I realize it was only a week ago I had my "mature" moment where I realized that I have grown, that I have some much bigger things to worry about, and that I have to stop thinking about the past and think about the future. Cuz really, if you dwell in the past, what is there to do? It's not like you can change anything. Nothing about the past than learning from it. That's what I say. Anyways, then I realized today from our motivational speaker person that I have sooooo much more of life left to live. I mean, it's not like I had no idea, I've just been reminded. ya know? yeah. And then me & stuart had this convo the other day about how we're still only 16 and technically children (as much as we hate hearing it) and we've got a long ways before we start thinking serious. (probably why we're not going out yet. that and the fact that we've both been hurt drastically before we met. ask me about it sometime, I'll explain further.) eh. made me think that I wanted to grow up too fast too soon. I've got another year and a half of high school. I'll slow down. maybe when it's too late, but I'll slow down. if you ask me, life begins to speed up at 12 and doesn't slow down until yer dead. just my simple-minded opinon, eh.

haha, I just made a smart comment! my mother was talking to my brother about how he needs to learn to do his homework ALL THE TIME no matter how bad it sucks. (she didn't quite use that language, BUT you get the point.) and then she brought up that I learned that lesson and I agreed. then she wondered why we had such a problem with it. then I said "y'know, I think everyone goes through a stage like that, but it's only the smart people that learn from it and do something about it." haHA! what now. unfortunatly, I am in the middle of my own statement. oO

whatelse, whatelse. oh, a week and 3 days, if anyone cares. which I'm sure they don't and have no idea what I'm talking about, but I'M excited. so there. neah. :P

so sunday night stuart calls me. (somehow the first extensive call on his part. oO) nothing big, I suppose. talked about some random stuff and then he's like "I found a book!" I'm not surprised, I've heard from other families (who've been in the area forever) that his family is SUPER SMART. good for the kids, it'll be. lol, anyways! so I ask what it is, and he's like "the legend of the candy cane!" so I'm like WTH? so he starts reading it, but he had to leave in the middle of it. I guess there was a little village and a guy comes and starts building a store. No one knows who he is or what he's doing, and no one offers help, so they just watch. then a little girl gets too curious and asks him if he needs help. the man says yes and then stuart had to go. (>:O) he said he would call me back later in the week, but it's prism week, which means next week/sunday. (*~* prism = equilavent to crystals @ OHS *~*)

Anyways. I think I've made this long enough for a week update. don't you?

~Rayla

@};~

~*~

You take a lot of chances with your feelings
No one really knows what you feel
Fixing is the only way you're dealin'
You turn your pretty head and think it's real
Oh, you
You take it so slowly
And your eyes look so lonely
But it's only when you think about me

~*~

Maybe you want her
Maybe you need her
Maybe you had her
Maybe you lost her to another
To another

70th post!

fwah! just goes to show I'm on this too much. eh? meh, I don't even know if I can count that high. lol.

anyways. took my giraffe to seminary agin. was much much fun. everyone likes agin.

I should probably stop updating, I never have anything of interest to talk about here. I think I shall shrink away from blogger for a while (possibly, if I can last) and work on more interesting aspects of life (my few stories that are bothering my fingertips) and come and visit every once in a while.

just a post saying "out to live my life"? not that I'm not living it already, just saying more-so.

but if anything drastic happens, I will come back to tell. other than that, no more random stuff.

~Rayla

@};~

ooh, colourful!

fwah, so I think I need a very colorful post. whata think?

so this morning at seminary, I brought my giraffe pillow, and stuart wanted to steal it. he made me laugh.

our tree fell over last night. hmm.

and someone pulled a silly alarm in the silly pool area. silly people. (silly? I meant stupid...)

I like stuart! (well there's nothing new.)

I love my seminary! (that's not new either.)

Going to the tristake dance with stuart! (hmm. third thing of old news. I need to get out more often.)

Leeb is evil! (doesn't want us to play all of nutcracker. DIE!)

I need some green on this post. and some bright obnoxious colors! ahaha!

I'm stalking mike. (that's exciting! lol, not really.)

I'm happy its winter and that I have a hunny to cuddle with! (finally.) yummy!

I'm thinking my parents might get me a car for christmas. (here's for hoping!)

Methinks I need more news. Meh. If I think of any, I'll be sure to come back and colorcode it. Ahaha, it's fun!

@};~

nativity!

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
Presents as our gift to the community
The 15th annual
Nativity Pageant
O Come Let Us Adore Him
December 8th, 9th and 10th
Friday, Saturday & Sunday 6:30 - 8:30
----
Performances every 30 minutes
7201 Woodridge Drive, Woodridge * 1/4 mile north of 75th Street

(has nothing to do with being mormon or not, so please come and see!)

@};~

So I was at church today, right? (duh.) and there's this girl behind me. we all got a calender and we notice a tri-stake dance. she turns to her neighbor and says "you know, there's this one boy that's never been to a stake dance?" and of course, I know who it is. the other girl says "really? who?" girl 1 says "stuart."

not that I'm any jealous, of course.

ACK!

I've been bitten!

Me: bite me! I can too!
Stuart: *bites* no you dont

(We were arguing that I can't spell. later:)

Me: hey! that's mean!
Me: I bite you.
Stuart: ouch *starts crying* MOMMY!!!!!!!
Me: *sticks toungue out as he runs away*
Stuart: *crys even more*
Me: *starts feeling a little bad*
Stuart: *still crying*
Me: *trys to hold back a smile and laugh but fails miserably*
Stuart: *crys even harder*
Me: *gets a bandaid*
Stuart: *doesnt see how its either funny or is going to help, so still crying*
Me: *puts it on her own booboo*
Me: *then gives him a hug*
Stuart: *doesnt help crying boy in any way*
Stuart: *oh, smiles*
Stuart: :)
Me: *then laughs at both of our stupidity*
Stuart: lol

Anyways! (Goodness I love that child.)

Ha! We got our tree today! It's too tall. We have to chop off the top. And a chunk on the bottom. Hmm. I want to put the star on this year! I want to put it on!

fwah, we got band on monday. huzzah! (its a rainbow!)

I should probably go now... I wonder when our game is tonight... hmm, I oughta go find out, eh?

@};~

HUZZAH!

it happened.

my answer has come.

only 13 hours after I was orignally supposed to!

oh, hallelujah! for the first time I was right, and it worked in my favor.

-raises head to sky- yes! thank you!

-lowers- right, I'm good. AK! I'm so happy!! I'm going to do several backflips if this gets any better. fwah!

ah. -sobs- so happy.

Stuart: in reference to your previous question, i think so
Stuart: question from seminary yesterday
Me: oh. yes?
Stuart: i think i like you too

thank you God, for letting me meet so many new people from my new seminary and church. I am an instrument in you hands and will remain so for the rest of my days.

@};~