well, I just got really stressed out all of the sudden.

thus: Hello, week of HELL.

late test tomorrow for mythology, paper due for bio I should've started two weeks ago, conducting exam (of "heaven"? since they're hymns and all), music history listening test (I will DEFINITELY fail - haven't been to class in a month) and written exam for the same class.

somebody kill me. kthxbai.

*spazz*

:D?

<3

HOLY AWESOME DAY, BATMAN!

and yes, I realize this is a double post, which I don't normally like to do, but I so don't care. XD

OMG. LIEK, SRSLY GUISE.
/lame

kay, so I thought today would be pretty ordinary and what have you. well, tonight I got to chat with Juli - some of you know her, she's in my ward and sooooo ossum - and we probably chatted for two hours over pancakes about the Lord. ohmyheezy, I didn't think I needed it, but I so did! and it was so amazing! I was just bearing my testimony to her about stuff I already knew, but had forgotten! it was such a wonderful experience, and I am sooooo happy she came over so I could chat with her. gah! I love the Lord and all of the blessings that he gives me! I'm especially grateful to know that he LOVES me and watches out for me all the time! ALL THE TIME! so many tender mercies and expressions of love and AAH! it's amazing, the gospel of the Church of Jesus Christ is so true ^_______^


and totally unrelated, my fiction project that took up my entire summer has now broken 30K words. that's exciting, guys! I've never written anything more than 18K! XD

anyways, that was my day. or, evening, rather.

:D

hope your day was equally awesome! ^_____^

this brought so much joy to my heart, for reasons unknown XD

they're all so ridiculous, *giggle*

chilluns, really. they don't have to grow up. XD

Each breath screaming: "We are all too young to die!"

Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You can't carry it with you if you want to survive.
[...]

The horses are coming 

So you better run

-

Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too
So I stayed in the darkness with you

-

Drag my teeth across your chest to tast your beating heart

-
-

this chick is brilliant.
jus' sayin'.
try some. she's gonna  be big, fo serious.

if it's a broken heart, then face it.

it's late, and I doubt I am in any sense "emotionally stable". however, this has been a reoccuring question in my life lately, and I extend it to you.

what am I? what makes me... me?

who am I?

I just realized 6th months until Scotty comes back! :O

quick! somebody teach me oodles of French! XD

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life. It goes on." 

- Robert Frost

good thing.

food for thought, I feel like a lot of us could benefit from this.

oh, no.

Zack, you left me a voice message tonight.

and I am so sorry. I can't even... begin to understand, and for that I'm sorry. But I want you to know I'm sorry that this is happening to you. 


but I'm grateful to my past self that I wrote you that note, cos then in this time of need you remembered me. for that I'm glad. it seems so long ago, doesn't it? when you were dating Charise, and I wrote you that note. I don't think I remember near a thing I wrote you.

but I love you.

and I am deeply sorry.



(sidenote: go away, 1am. x_x )

Well, I just took a trip down memory lane that I meant to avoid.

2 reoccurring thoughts as I scrolled through my facebook friend list:

• a lot has changed since high school.... 
• (thank goodness; I didn't want to keep contact with a lot of them anyway)
• I'm friends with a lot of attractive people!

...that's all, really.


also, that I love you.

If not, that's okay.

And when you're gone, will they say your name?
And when you're gone, will they love you the same?
Oh, when you're gone, we won't say your word
But you know that's okay.


----------------------------------------------------------------


A year ago this homecoming weekend, she was sitting on my couch, urging me and my roommate to come see the parade with her. a year ago, she would've been dating you.

if only we knew then what we knew now. but that's life.


6 months later, she had removed every bit of you from her life. it hurt you - oh, did I see how it broke you for a time. you were angry, furious that she displayed so little care for you, that she seemed to single out you to put you through such pain.



Now, I can't help but wonder if she thought she was protecting you by removing herself from your picture.

because, perhaps, she knew.


and maybe I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt.

but look how far a year has taken us.

:D?

today I was in my volleyball class, right? trying to score as many points as we could so we could get "ranked" or whatever.

well.

we had already played 2 games, and we were on our third. the other team was right behind us in points, so we wanted to get going. 2-1, we're up, and I'm serving (oh BOY!). serve went over the net; bump, set, spike.... INTO MY FACE.

I just remember seeing that thing two feet in front of me and how my brain was surprisingly blank, haha. Hit my face, stunned me, and I fell back out of the way. apparently, as my teammates tell me, it had enough force that it went over the net and we got the point, XD. I didn't see it, obviously, I thought the floor was the most interesting thing at that point. But yeah, ball hits the floor, and everybody realizes I've got my face in my hand and start freaking out. haha! it wasn't even bad - no blood or anything. I was just so stunned my body didn't know how to react and started laughing and crying all at once. so awkward, haha! but yeah, we kept playing and ended up being seeded first :3

the boy who hit the spike felt so bad, I couldn't help but think about another boy during high school who rear-ended me on our way out from seminary. so apologetic, and it doesn't even bother me. I appreciate the sentiment, I guess. better than the other guy in HS who hit in me in the face with a soccer ball in gym class and ran off laughing.

anyway, I'm tough. I gotta good head ;)