purple water

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! ...even though I feel like crap and should be asleep in bed. I went home sick during school with a fever (100.7). tsk. so in spite of the halloween, I shall share a scary moment with you. I've been saving this for I don't know how long.

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER NINTH: I took two showers.

Now, you may be asking, "What is so important about her taking two showers?" Well, here's something you should know: I don't take two showers in the same day. Ever. Well obviously except for what's noted above, but other than that, never. Two things worth mentioning about the showers, though:

The first shower was early morning. Suds were white.

Second shower was late night. Suds were purple.

I know what you're thinking. "Purple?! What on earth made purple soap suds?!"

Here is my answer:

:D Because Kit and me had a little too much fun when we were hanging out. Isn't that exciting? scary, I know. even though it happened a long time ago, but wahtever. I was like "I am NOT going to church with multi-colored hair!" so yeah. that was fun. for reference, this was the saturday before I came to school with the tips of my hair blue. even though no one noticed that, either. ah well. I still have some blue stuff, too. maybe I shall surprise you all. stay tuned!

off to bed,

~Rayla @};~

flying bible-bearing pigs

The Bible says..."Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses."

I still believe pigs can fly. I don't have to see to believe; they only fly when I'm not looking.

SEPTEMBER 21 – OCTOBER 27

11:50 AM

Me and Joel broke up.

But it was ok. 5 weeks and a day, a record to live up to from now on. Right? And it doesn't hurt as much as I though it would. But I will portray what does.

On our back to class from lunch, walking together like we always have. We walk in silence. Not uncommon for us, but uneasy, as most silent things are for me. He speaks. "I think we ought to break up," My heart plummets to my stomach. I breathe, trying to smile. I ask why. He explains. "It's just not you. You're beautiful and all, and talented too, but I just don't think I want a girl right now."

Oh well. 5 weeks and a day…who'd a thunk it, right?...

Ah.

But then I tell Kylie and she says that she's happy (not yay happy, just relaxed happy) that we did, b/c apparently he's been flirting with someone backstage in the play and whatnot, so I say posh to that. Didn't mean much to me when she said it, only when I saw him after the play that night. Then John (the idiot he is) says "oh, look, there's joel with somebody else!" so I leave and go for a drive, bawling my eyeballs out and not particularly knowing where I'm going, and I end up at david's doorstep. by this time I had kinda settled down, since my radio cut out and I was annoyed about that, and I knock on his window (since I saw someone at the computer in the upper level, and thought it silly to ring when there's someone right there). David comes out and I start bawling again. and he knows. he just knows. so we go out for a drive on the "country" roads on the other side of wolf. and we talk, and talk, and talk, and talk. which was nice.

I love that kid. (not like that, you crazy people.) he's such a comfort to me. and as we told each other multiple times, we always will be. I'm so glad to have a friend like him. makes me smile in a time of despair.

~Rayla~

tears

and the two or three people I want the most attention from I can't even begin to bring it up to tell them...

isn't life wonderful?

I know mine isn't as swell as it should be.

more to follow. anne, visit the other.

~Rayla

so how are ya’ll? I’m good, thanks for asking. hehehe. little hyper, more distracted than anything, but hey. today’s post is going to be one of those where I vent, so here’s your chance to back out!

-cough- anyways. so today was pretty good. chemistry was funny, we were talking about how if you don’t know how to solve something, guess something with moles (the number, not the animal). so he was asking all sorts of questions, and one of them was “why is Illinois flat?” and we all go “MOLES!” and we all start cracking up after we realize what we said and he imitates one and goes “whoo, I’m a mole, let’s eat all this dirt, whoops, a rock. Aw, look, now it’s flat!” It was so funny. it was a pretty good imitation, too. hehehe. Band was pathetic today, practically all the brass was gone, so we had a woodwind sectional the whole time, which gets pretty boring when you don’t have the same part as everyone else. oh well, that’s what I get for choosing a scholarship instrument. :P US history was boring, had a sub and did “work” which no one did, and theory was even worse because our sub never showed up, so we didn’t do anything then. but of course, that’s when my day got considerably worse…

so I was talking to one of my friends in that class, and she told me some disturbing news. I’m not sure if I should direct that info over mainstream internet, but lets just say I found out one of my friends isn’t being the best that they should be. in the context that I now know two people that do drugs. lovely. and I thought they were so much better, and to find out they’ve been doing it for a year! I’m just horrified. my friend from theory wants to tell the drug-friend’s parents, but she doesn’t know how…. to get a hold of them, let them know and not break the friendship at the same time…. ugh, a dire situation if there ever was one. sheesh, and I don’t know who I can tell that won’t go off and have a domino effect because of me. eh.

Off of that. Distracted, leave me a comment as to what I should do, but don’t leave me a paragraph. email’s for that. yeah? …

huge bruise on my leg the size of… -calculates- …a baseball. go soccer in gym! not.

anyways... toodles!

~Rayla {v} ~

ps- want to know something scary? I found someone CONSIDERABLY more crazy than me. I mean this is like scary-crazy when he’s like this. it’s so creepy! (by the way, mike, that would be one of the mystery contestants. :P are we keeping up with that? just for kicks?)

Fwah, I forgot to post this last Saturday:

MONTHAVERSAIRY! con me novio!

hehe. go us.

Anyways. I'm so happy, I understand music theory! and not only that, it's getting easier! I'm so proud of myself. And I get to resume lessons the 30th! huzzah!

So East's last game was last friday and I think a score was 6-46 them. I don't know for sure, I left after halftime. (I know, tsk on me! My cousin Kasey came instead and we hung out places. I took her driving and whatnot, fun stuff.) So yeah. :)

Nothing else of interest to say. Other than my play is in A WEEK FROM THIS FRIDAY.....GAH! I didn't think I would make it this far. I start the whole shibang, so what if I can't get myself to go? stuck with fear? then what? ugh....

~Rachael

for them, for myself

You can say everything
But it won’t change a thing
I’m sick of the secrets
You can say what you mean
But it can’t change a sin
I’m sick of the secrets

And I don't know where to look my words just break and melt
Please just save me from this darkness

The last girl in [her] last reason to make this last for as long as [she] could
First kiss [and her] first time that [she] felt connected to anything
The weight of water, the way you told [her] to look past everything [she] had ever learned
The final word in the final seconds you ever uttered to [her] was love

that is why I am strong with my relationship, mike.

5 more minutes of first block.... hehehe.

SO. Carl's emo cow post was awesome, anne is a nut, mike won't update (slacker!) and I'm hearing rumors! AAH! drama rumors, no less. oh dear, I won't get into THAT, will I...

I was going to say something. Oh! I love it when peolle comment on how cool I look when I'm flagging. ex Carl last night when he was talking about how flagging is cool but he would never do it. silly carl. silly anyone who thinks flagging is easy! so many things to think about...and speaking of flagging, I learned the JP routine last night.... go me.

anyways, g2g. to gym! to gym... ew.

@};~

"I am not concerned with you liking me or not, I just ask that you respect me as a human being."

What powerful words in a quote. Me gusta. So I'm bored out of my mind, and I was surfing around on deviantart and found this quote:

"I like coffee. I like hugs. The best is drinking coffee while giving a hug. Or being hugged while drinking coffee. Or hugging coffee while drinking a hug. Have you ever done that? neither have i."

amusing, regardless of the fact that I hate coffee. eh. I'll substitute 'coffee' with something else. :)

stupid game this stupid friday...and stupid routine I don't freeken know...stupid colorguard. (stupid sammon...) jk. for those who care, I'm even skipping orchestra tomorrow for this stupid routine. now what? geez...they better pay attention and learn the frikin thing or I'm going to sit out the last game and not humiliate myself of the fact that I don't know it. sheesh. oh geez, that reminds me, I oughta tell them I won't be there...

gotta go!

@};~

so as I was thinking about this past week and how I will most likely be cranky every friday from now until the end of orchestra, I realized that I have a problem. a small one, maybe. I hope.

I have low self-esteem.

lovely, ain't it? small problem, fixable, and least I'm not taking drugs. (like someone I know... -coughANNEcough- ...jk, jk.) but anyways, if anyone knows how to fix it, please try to fix it or tell me how, because I don't know how.

@};~

Hehehe. Guess what guys! I get to go to a par-tay tomorrow! And you don't. Jk. She's from church, if you came, that'd be awkward. Anyways, I'm learning the PB&J Dance! aka the EFY line dance but that's besides the point. the point is that I'm going to learn it and I'm going to embaras everyone that knows me and make them wish they didn't! MWAHAHAHA! I already know some of it, but hey, that's the first two-ish lines out of maybe 20. SO! I learn, quickfast and make myself look silly! and then everyone laugh and I go cry. :( jk not really. I laugh with them as they try to copy me. ME GUSTA! I can't wait.

Anyways. Want to know something weird? Me and Joel's monthaversary is the week of sweetest day. I could not have planned that any better. jk. I hope I get a flower. ^^ if not, I still love him anyway.

Fwah, Hilly! You're rubbing off on me! Eeesh, I gotta go! Practice awaits!

~Rachael @};~

All At Once Lyrics
The Fray

There are certain people you just keep coming back to

She is right in front of you

You begin to wonder could you find a better one

Compared to her now she's in question

And all at once the crowd begins to sing

Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her

Maybe you started to compare to someone not there

Looking for the right one you line up the world to find

Where no questions cross your mind

But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt

Much longer for you to sort it out

And all at once the crowd begins to sing

Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her

Maybe you started to compare to someone not there

Maybe you want it, maybe you need it

Maybe it's all you're running from

Perfection will not come

And all at once the crowd begins to sing

Sometimes

We'd never know what's wrong without the pain

Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her

Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there

Maybe you want it, maybe you need it

Maybe it's all you're running from

Perfection will not come

Maybe you want her, maybe you need her

Maybe you had her, maybe you lost her to another

To another

GAH! my quads hurt like nothing else... eeesh, I walk in the door with a limp and my mom laughs at me. then I say "yes, I know, I'm a gimp" and she falls onto the floor. I haven't forgiven her yet... lol.

Got my results from the Pre-ACT back. Here, I show:

Math- 21

English- 27

Science- 24

Reading- 26

Overall: 25.

I'll improve. I definitly did from the PLAN test, I got this:

Math- 21

English- 19

Science-20

Reading- 19

Overall Estimate: between 21-25.

So I did lots better in English, but went nowhere in Math. Not surprising, though... I had Roake was a teacher last year. Remember him, Carl? Eeesh.

Anyways, I'm good. Lots better from my last post. I had a mood swing and I wasn't getting any attention. As far as we girls go, pretty normal, I guess. ANYHOW... I'm outa here. SLEEP!

~Rachael

Anybody know what Vienna is? I'm too lazy to research it if someone already knows. Fwah, that sounded way self-centered, didn't it? Eh, I'm getting bad with that. Probably why I didn't make IMEA... tch, and speaking of bassoon...

My lesson teacher might have breast cancer. My mom says she goes in to get tests every year, so they caught it early. I still say any kind of cancer is taboo in my vocab. Any kind of cancer is the same kind: deadly. I don't care, I'm being stubborn, thank you, and I don't need anyone's sympathy. I'm dealing with this myself. I've found that's the only way I can teach myself anything. Hmf. Are we even talking about the same thing? I doubt it.

So yeah. Other than the bad, I got the Fray cd. It came out last year, but that's new to me. I want the new goo-goo dolls cd, too, but I probably won't be able to get at it for another year. Whoo. Go my living-under-a-rock syndrome. Tch.

G'night! I'll stop troubling you with my useless drama.

~Rayla @};~

Well. I'm extremely surprised at how fast everyone who had a part in my poem got back to me with the OKs! Greatly surprised. It looks like most of them got back to me within 12 hours. Which, I think, is great. I didn't get OKs from two people, but from what it looks like, it shouldn't matter. Everyone is pleased with their part, so I'm happy to present my poem.

***

Of angels wings and broken things
All friends are always there to see
All faults to never see again,
I've got some friends close to me:
Of one, whom I have known so long
But more was known in all good time
We've comforted when both our hearts were weak
She is surely a good friend of mine.
Of another who tires to hide his light
Behind closed walls, broken door chime
Though we both hide to find ourselves
He is surely a good friend of mine.
Another still whose seen me fall
And picked me up to make me fine,
She is strong, I long to be,
She is surely a good friend of mine.
A fourth, I know, is way head smart
And helps me out, since start, no end
We have our voices guide us through,
He is surely my good friend.
Second to last on my list of friends,
A hero in fourth's story, from innocence fell
And though her ways may change and blur,
We are sisters, others we tell.
Finally, but important to last,
A friend who sometimes confuses me,
This one who surely comforted most,
Surely we shall never be swallowed in the sea.
Anne is the one whose shoulder is wet,
Carl is the one whose light shines so bright.
Kit is the one who I think is strong,
Zack is the one whose got brains in his head.
Charise is the one who my sister should be,
Mike is the one who has comforted me.
All my friends whom I all love so dear,
Take a good look, for it all is so clear.

***

I don't even know what inspired me to write this. But I can tell you this: It's not going to be the last one I write about you guys. And yes, to those of you that noticed, I changed the wording around a little on some bits. If you didn't notice, that's ok. I think I only changed a few parts... And yes, I did say I posted this a day later than it is. so? ...but anyways.

Flying higher than I have been,

~Rayla @};~

wow. I just forgot where I was. I was listening to my new Fray cd, and reading through people's blogs, and I forgot that I wasn't at my house, around my things. I'm at kit's house, reading through your stuff on her computer, feeling love for you all.

I love being comfortable. at someone else's house, no less.

hehe. flag sweatshirts will look good, methinks.

@};~

oh, yes. by the way.

I didn't make IMEA. and I nearly cried during lunch. and third block. and forth block. okay, nearly all day. shut up. but after practicing this for a year, who wouldn't be upset? ...

...

"I think you oght to know that I'm feeling very depressed. Thought you ought to know. Life? Don't talk to me about life."

-Marvin, the depressed robot (from HGTTG)

At school now. hehehe. going to stay after for my play (:D) and then go home, make sweatshirt imprints with kit, and then go over to her house and SLEEPOVER! when was the last time I said that? goodness, when I was like, 6. ok, not really. but hey!

hehehe. I like my play. end of story.

@};~

Ever wish you could go back and take back everything you said? Ever wish you hadn't started a conversation? Ever wish you hadn't been so foolish to make someone think that they were wrong, even when they were right, and the one trying to show you that you were wrong?

Heh.

I do. Right now.

@};~

Well, IMEA auditions went well....for the most part. Etudes and scales were as good as I could possibly get them, and the sightreading SUCKED. like mad. Ack, 9/8 time, some crazy key sig I hardly ever play (1#), and some crazy rhythem, like a quarter note and two 16th notes. it threw me off. so the whole thing I basically played straight triplets. Hopefully I got all the right notes and stuff, I don't know. I didn't stop though, that's pretty good, right?

ECK. I hate sightreading. with a vengance. I don't know how anyone could manage sightSINGING. now that seems impossible to me, singing intervals you've never heard of. At least for me I can put down the right fingers and blow and I get the right note (usually). Eh.

Oh well, nothing I can do now. Except wait for my scores to come back and see if I made it. Which I pray I did, I've been practicing that stupid music for ages.

PRAY FOR ME, I hope I made it.

~Rayla~

ps- me and joel offical for two weeks on thursday. :)