Tonight, I knelt in the middle of my room with my heart on a table before God. I asked him what to do with it. He couldn't tell me.

I began to cry.

All at once my roommates came in and, with a head on each shoulder, they began to comfort me that words can not even describe.

With my face half buried in Andrea's shoulder and the rest covered by my hand, I couldn't help but ask, "Why?" Why did He take away quite possibly the only thing I've ever wanted? Why, after all the prayers and blessings did I still fail?

The tears trickled down my arm, and I couldn't help it. Why?

I know because He closed this door He'll open a window somewhere.

But it hurts.

I have failed.

But time will still move, with or without me. Gotta remember to embrace the other blessings God has given me.

But I need time.