what he/they must surely be thinking.

Well my relationship fodder don't mean to bother nobody
But Cupid's automatic musta fired multiple shots at her
Because she fall in love too often that's what the matter
At least when I'm talking about it keep a pattern of flattery and
She was starin' through the doorframe, and
Eyeing me down like already a bad boyfriend
Well she can get her toys outta the drawer then
Cause I ain't comin' home I don't need that attention, see


I don't care what she might think about me
She'll get by without me if she wants.

I totally abhor people who change plans and don't bother telling you.

It makes me sick. and SO angry.

maybe I would've liked to come with you. I would've been flattered that you even thought to include me. but I'm just a backdrop, I'm just supporting cast. why include a listed name with no speaking parts? no big deal. she'll be busy, she won't have fun.

come on.


/groan

I hate people.

:\

what would you say? if you ran into Job, if he had just lost his house, his family, his everything? what would you say to a child, who has just lost their parents and couldn't ever see them again? what would you say to a woman who has to leave her husband because he was unfaithful?

but what would you say to a man who had laid himself out on a platter to give to a girl? and what if, by chance of situation, she said yes, but then came back and went oh wait...

how do you tell them that it's going to be okay? really? keep talking at them so they can't hear their own thoughts? shove mounds of cookies and cream ice cream into them? do you just leave them alone to figure it out for themselves, or do you keep showing up in their living room whenever you can, if only to remind them, hey, I still think you're awesome...

how do you remind them of their testimony? how do you remind them that their Father in heaven loves them SO infinitely that he would sacrifice a perfect Son for us? but then, how do you counteract their argument when they attempt to justify themselves by quoting prophets who have said that any righteous man and woman can be happy in a marriage if they're willing to work?


what do you say to a man who is completely, utterly, helplessly, inexplicably and mind-numbingly broken?

Natalie: Ward thingy?!?! O.O *drools*

because no matter where you go in Provo, you'll always want to come back here. XD

dear life:

two years ago, you took him away. now you're about to give him back in roughly three weeks time.

I'm tempted to ask you if you'll just keep him.

cordially yours,
rayla.

It still surprises me how similar people can be, even when separated by thousands of miles and beliefs and circumstance.

We're all feel the same. And that's somehow comforting.

But darling I want the same thing that I wanted before
So sweetheart tell me what's up I won't stop no way

break, in summary.

This break has been something else. Every time I go home, it seems like a new thing pops up for the family to work through. It's a crazy experience, but worth it.

The first full week I committed myself to hangin' with them. It must've proven to be a bit too much, though, by that Saturday I was gearing to get out of that house and go exploring or something. Haha! Unfortunately, it didn't happen. But oh well. :) Me and my mom somehow synced up to each other for the two weeks I was back, so we've been at each other's throats for the last three days on top of all the estrogen that's been circulating around the house, XD. Yeah, ouch. But we made up today during church (of all places, aha) and we're fine now. I think. Such is family, you never know what you're gonna get sometimes. My dad helped me balance my checkbook (I'm really bad at recording things sometimes, so it was like a little treasure hunt to make sure everything worked out!) and we got to the end with fairly little causality haha. I don't think he got TOO upset about my fail!record keeping, but I definitely got a little angry at my past self. new year's resolution, anyone? tehe.

I went and saw Mike and David last Friday, too. Anne was supposed to come but she had to clean the house and work and stuff. boo. T'was nice! I thought it was gonna be awkward, but it was basically like old times. David rambling away forever about tech blahblahblah and me and Mike making funny faces at each other and indirectly at David. Funny how some things change, and how others don't. It won't stay that way forever, I know, but we might yet retain some of that inner child just especially for each other when that occasion comes around again.

Next semester is fast approaching (TUESDAY what the crap) and I'm excited to pwn it. There's a class or two I'm mildly concerned about (World Music and Algebra, to clarify; possibly Intro to English Language [from a linguistic point of view] but probably cos I don't know how that's even going to work out. but still, excited!), but I'm hoping to get into a swing of things and stick with it. Actually, I'm more concerned with picking myself up if I fall behind, but I'm sure I'll be able to do it. I'll think about last semester and be motivated to keep running, so to speak, so I'll keep truckin' until spring semester when I can run off in a corner and die. Haha!

Blahblahblah Rach, we dun care.

Right-o. Hope your break was fantastical, and I hope that any travels will be safe and uneventful. Much love and fluff!